Preparation
When you prepare for the holidays your thoughts are filled with making the perfect bird, what side dishes everyone might want, and how your home is decorated. The last thing you want to do is think about the fights that might break out. Unfortunately a lot of people have issues on certain holidays. There always seems to be that one family get together that you have to go to, where you know you are going to see the relative(s) that cause drama. We can usually avoid that relative on most occasions and even when we can’t it doesn’t seem to be so bad until you surround the person with family members that they have to prove something too. You know who I’m talking about.
This year try something different. Don’t bite! Don’t react. If you have to speak to this person, try thinking of them as a customer and keep the conversation light and un-meaningful. If you are successful you might possibly enjoy the get-together.
Don’t Engage!
I realize that it is hard to not engage in the drama when you are related to the situation. It is even more difficult when you can actually feel the tension in the room when this person enters it. It is almost as if the very air is being sucked out of the room. The worst part, is having to overcome your natural reaction to defend yourself or someone you care about if this person goes on the verbal attack.
We can be the bigger person. Not stooping to their level is the key to shutting them down. If you treat them like they are not that important it takes away their ability to get a reaction from you. People like this feed on the negative feelings they create in you and when you react it fuels their fire. Keep in mind that they will push buttons that they know will work because they are your family and to them you are an open book that they have read many times. Turn the page!
Relax and Enjoy Yourself
Without personal growth and knowing your own shortcomings you will always be a target for holiday drama. So this year try something new and be the person who can have a good time and avoid drama on the holidays.